| Red Dwarf Season 2 Quotes |
Holly: Nothing wrong with dog's milk: full of goodness; full of vitamins; full of marrow-bone jelly! Lasts longer than any other type of milk, dog's milk.
Lister: Why's that?
Holly: No bugger will drink it!
Rimmer: You're about as much use as a condom machine in the Vatican.
Lister: I had this Geography teacher, Miss Foster. She took us on a school summer camp trip to the Ganwee. I had the tent next to hers, right. And in the middle of the night I was woken up by this really weird noise. She didn't think men were better than machines.
The Cat: As soon as I find the right small group of girls, the seven or eight women who are right for me, my wandering days are over buddy!
Holly: I was in love once -- a Sinclair ZX-81. People said, "No, Holly, she's not for you." She was cheap, she was stupid and she wouldn't load -- well, not for me, anyway.
Lister: Look at what he's given me for dinner: a pea on toast. One pea. I tell you...I'm that far from cracking. (tries to eat pea, it jumps off the plate) I've lost my pea! Oh, that's it! I've cracked.
Rimmer: He's just doing this to destroy your morale.
Lister: Is he? Well, I want my pea back. It's my pea. I earned that pea. Where is it? I don't care if it's on the floor all covered in fluff, if it's under the bed with my toenail clippings, I don't care where it is -- it's my pea, I earned it, and I'm going to eat it no matter what!
Rimmer: It flew off into your dirty-sock basket.
Lister: I'll just have the toast.
Rimmer: You? How did you get into art college?
Lister: The normal way you get into art college, the same old usual boring normal way you get in: I failed my exams and applied -- they snapped me up!
Holly: Additional: Our biggest enemy is going space crazy through loneliness. The only thing that helps me maintain my slender grip on reality is the friendship I share with my collection of singing potatoes.
Holly: It's better to have loved and to have lost than to listen to an album by Olivia Newton-John....Anything's better than listening to an album by Olivia Newton-John!
Lister: `Mr Arnold' isn't even his name. His name's `Rimmer'; or `Smeghead'; or `Dinosaur breath'; or `Molecule Mind'. And if you want to be really mega-polite to him, Kryten -- we're talking mega-mega-polite -- on those rare and exceptional circumstances, you can call him `Arsehole'.
Holly: As the days go by, we face the increasing inevitability that we are alone in a godless, uninhabited, hostile and meaningless universe. Still, you've got to laugh, haven't you?
Lister: It happens, you know, Rimmer. You meet people, then you move on, man. When I was ten, I had a friend called Duncan. Me best mate ever. He taught me everything. He was the one who showed me how to put mirrors on me toecaps so I could look up girl's skirts. Then his father had to move to Spain because of a job. It was a bank job he pulled in Perlie. Never saw him again. I still think of him, though... every time I look at me shoes.
Lift Hostess: Welcome to Xpress Lifts, descent to floor sixteen. You will be going down two thousand, five hundred and sixty-seven floors and, for a small extra charge, you can enjoy the in-lift movie "Gone With the Wind". If you look to your right and to your left, you will notice there are no exits. In the highly unlikely event of the lift having to make a crash-landing, death is certain. Under your seats you will find a cassette for recording your last-minute testament, and from above your head a bag will drop containing sedatives and cyanide capsules...
Rimmer: Lister? How did you know about Inflatable Ingrid?
Lister: I've been seeing her behind your back.
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