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Red Dwarf Season 3 quotes
Kryten: Pub: ah, yes, a meeting place where people attempt to reach advanced states of mental incompetence by the repeated consumption of fermented vegetable drinks.
Lister: This is crazy! Why are we talking about going to bed with Wilma Flintstone....she'll never leave Fred and we know it.
Rimmer: As far as I can see it, we have two options: One, we take it on and kill it; or Two, run away. Who's for Two?
[Rimmer's 'anger' emotions have been disabled]
Rimmer: Look, just because it's an armor-plated alien killing machine that salivates unspeakable slobber, doesn't mean it's a bad person. What we've got to do is get it round a table, and put together a solution package : perhaps over tea and biscuits.
Rimmer: I think we're all beginning to lose sight of the real issue here, which is: what are we going to call ourselves? I think it comes down to a choice between "The League Against Salivating Monsters" or, my own personal preference, which is "The Committee for the Liberation and Integration of Terrifying Organisms and their Rehabilitation Into Society." One drawback with that--the abbreviation is CLITORIS!
Rimmer: What about the Rimmer Directive, which states, "Never tangle with anything that's got with more teeth than the entire Osmond family"?
Cat: This isn't a meal -- this is an autopsy!
Kryten: We could go to Dallas in November, 1963, stand on the grassy knoll and shout "Duck!" ... I'm sorry; I must have bypassed my Good Taste Chip.
Rimmer: Kryten, unpack Rachel and get out the puncture repair kit. I'm ALIVE!
Kryten: No Silicon Heaven? Preposterous! Where would all the calculators go?
Lister: Just out of interest: Is Silicon Heaven the same place as human Heaven?"
Kryten: Human heaven? Goodness me, humans don't go to Heaven! No, someone made that up to prevent you all from going nuts!
Lister: We're on a mining ship, three million years into deep space. Can someone explain to me where the smeg I got this traffic cone?
Cat: Hey, it's not a good night unless you get a traffic cone! It's the policewoman's helmet and the suspenders I don't understand!
Rimmer: If we're talking about famous firsts - my first french kiss. It's gotta be a killer story. Fourteen years old. We went on holiday with my Uncle Frank and his daughters. Sixteen. Twins. Blonde. Now I knew that Sarah fancied me, but I wasn't too sure about Alice. Anyway, middle of the night, I wake up with this tongue stuck down my throat. Wide awake now - I couldn't beleive my eyes. It was Uncle Frank! He'd got the wrong room - he thought I was my mum!
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